Yesterday afternoon almost killed me. Not really, but sorta. It was one of those days where things started out fine, but by 2:00 I was praying for kids to be in bed, asleep. I was not mom of the year yesterday evening. Heck, I wasn’t even average.
You ever have those days? They happen more often than I’d like to admit. When something outside of the kids is bothering me, suddenly my kids are a million times more irritating, and super normal things, like a 10 month old crying and needing his mommy, or a four year old having a hard time when her Mimi and Papa leave, are almost unbearable to me. I hope I’m not alone.
Yesterday, I was having a moment. A” moment” that lasted hours. I know it’s wrong to be negative like that, to not give my kids grace when my own heavenly Father gives me grace a million times a day. But there I was. It may have been that my mom and stepdad headed home and I felt sad, or that the weekend was over and I wasn’t ready yet, but all my “excuses” didn’t exactly give me permission to be a rotten mom and wife.
But lucky for me, my family loves me. Even when I’m grumpy or a complete punk. Late in the day, when I was finally unwinding, I remembered that awesome truth. I don’t have to be perfect, or great, or even okay-ish for them to love me…they just do. Thank goodness.
And once I was calm, I was able to think about the sweet little moment from our grocery trip earlier in the day. We were checking out at Walmart when Harlyn asked if we had to pay for our stuff “at this store.” We told her yes, we have to pay for whatever we’re getting at any store. And do you know what MY SWEET, DARLING, WONDERFUL DAUGHTER DID? She pulled out her crumpled dollar bills from her itty-bitty jean shorts pocket and said, “Mommy, is one enough, or do they need two?” I could have cried. I gently told her that I so appreciated her offer to buy our food, but that Mommy and Daddy would love to buy these groceries for our family, and we’d like her to save her money to spend on something special.
Anyway. On days like yesterday, I need to focus on all the good moments that occur. Even the hard days are full of them, if I choose to see them. The same little girl who was bringing me to the brink of insanity had just hours earlier offered to empty her pockets for our family.
So this week, I’m going to focus on all the good and happy moments we have. There are plenty.